I Don’t Vote in Elections, But I Voted in Eurovision and That’s Basically the Same Thing

“It’s literally an international referendum on nationalism, soft power, and whose ballad makes you cry in a glitter cape”

In a bold display of civic delusion, 29-year-old expat Sara Dubonnet declared herself deeply politically engaged—because she voted in the Eurovision Song Contest.

“It’s literally an international referendum on nationalism, soft power, and whose ballad makes you cry in a glitter cape,” said Sara, while booking front-row tickets to next year’s contest in Austria.

Friends say Sara has proudly never voted in an election—neither in her native France nor in Luxembourg, where she’s lived for seven years and is legally eligible.

“It’s not my fault politics is boring,” she shrugged. “Maybe more people would care if the Minister for Agriculture wore a rhinestone cowboy hat and sang their policies in falsetto.”

Her roommate Steve confirmed that Sara has never read a local news article, although she claims otherwise.

“I skimmed a Luxembourg Times headline once. It said something about energy reform. Or a rosé tasting for British expats. Honestly, same vibe,” she commented.

Despite her news blackout, Sara insists she’s not uninformed—just “globally minded. That’s why I care more about Croatia’s dance number than Luxembourg’s housing crisis! Art is resistance. Rent is... kind of a drag.” 

According to Sara, Eurovision is actually more trustworthy than most elections.

“When Sweden gets 400 televote points, I understand that. It’s transparent. It’s fair. It’s democracy in sequins. Try saying that about the Luxembourg coalition agreement.”

She also argued that Eurovision had more real-world consequences: “Finland’s goth rave ballad literally sparked a youth movement. Luxembourg’s land tax reform? Crickets. I saw more emotion at Moldova’s key change.”

Asked if she planned to vote in Luxembourg’s next election, Sara was firm: “Absolutely not. But I have been asked to judge a cutest dog contest in my commune. And that is a huge civic responsibility. I’m voting for the one in glitter. Obviously.”